The Pride of Life:

Not until my twenties did I truly begin to realize what my biggest struggle in life is. Pride. When I use the word Pride I don’t necessarily mean boastful; more along the lines of Strong Willed and Independent, leading to many strong walls in my life, therefore resulting in Pride. There are probably 5 people in this world that truly know me, and they would all tell you that the hardest thing about being my friend, sister or companion was getting through that brick wall that I’ve got all around me.

This struggle in my life makes my relationship with Christ incredibly difficult. There are times in my life that I have allowed Him to hold me and comfort me and be to me the Father that He is, but it’s something that I constantly struggle with. I do the same thing with Drew. I will find myself leaving him at arms length from my life and my heart and when I realize I have done this to him, I HATE MY NATURE. Being married has really opened my eyes to this struggle. Having a person that I walk with daily I realize that these prideful bricks around my life must be taken down. Though I may take them down one at a time. Chipping away with the help of my sweet Jesus and the Love of my husband I have removed many, and will continue to.

Throughout my 14 weeks of pregnancy my pride problem has surfaced as well. I would consider myself a strong person, with a strong presence, high energy and highly motivated. Being pregnant removes all of these things. Surviving on smoothies and Gatorade and sleeping your life away you loss all sense of reality. I could no longer run, hike or work out, I never wanted to be around people let alone pursue any of my favorite hobbies (ie: photography) and I hated that. The past week I have been given my strength back and lost my nausea and I have never been so grateful. But, for my next pregnancy and when these times hit again in this pregnancy I have learned to set aside my pride and embrace this sacrifice for my little child.

I cannot imagine how much this little baby is going to change both Drew and I. I am overwhelmed with excitement and anticipation. And on the other side being scared for my life, wanting to slow down time. Anyways, if you’ve read thus far, thanks! ☺

Just needed to have some true confessions.

many you have seen...

Gosh, just looking at these pictures makes me sad that I haven't been out taking pictures lately. But being pregnant and tired out of your mind kind of works against you. I am getting better though. ;) 

Pray for my crazy girl Linds. She went and fell off of a ladder and had to have some holes drilled into her head. Anyways... thus far she is stable and last I heard she was talking with her parents, until they gave her some pain killers. Anyways, lift up some prayers if you have time. Thanks so much.

shan